SLOAF-P12: “Commando” – Garbage Legends Haul Edition
Category: SLOAF-P (Primary Series)
Variant: P12 – Urban Utility Valorwear
Codex Seal: PRIMO GRIME™
🗑️ Description:
He doesn’t drive a truck. He is the truck.
Welcome to the shirt that answers the eternal question: “What if sanitation work was more dangerous than war—and twice as heroic?” Featuring a flexed-out garbage truck warrior giving dual thumbs-up approval, flames of destiny, and an eagle carrying a TRASH CAN like it’s Excalibur, Commando is the official uniform of Garbage Legends who Haul.
PRIMO GRIME™ badge included, because you earned that grime.
🧻 Features:
“Commando” arched across the chest in flame-tone valor font
Bald eagle wielding heavy-duty garbage (no banana peel cowardice here)
Garbage truck mid-flames, mid-wheelie
Flexed arms that defy OSHA guidelines
“GARBAGE LEGENDS – Haul” motto that demands respect
Hidden inside tag: Commander SLOAF, looking disapproving (as he should)
💥 Ideal For:
Sanitation workers and the sanitation curious
Commute philosophers who smell the truth
Anyone who ever rode the back of a truck and waved like a king
🛑 Caution:
Wearing this shirt may result in unsolicited salutes, respect from raccoons, and a dramatic increase in bicep circumference (unconfirmed).
Commander SLOAF Approved
Wearable Heresies
SLOAF-P12